Since you've written your card and delivered it to me already, I guess it makes this card a little easier to write, provided you've given food for thought. I guess the best way to approach this is to jump straight into it, being as how I'm starting this card 40 minutes into your birthday, EST.
I'd have to agree with your point that envisioning us, one year older from the time where I bawled that first night upon sleeping in my dorm, like this was practically impossible. I couldn't envision a point where I didn't go to you for every single thing that went wrong in my life, or if I just simply needed a hug. It was simply unfathomable, and honestly, I can say now that it was beyond unhealthy. What ever we had, be it a mash up of pent up hormones and bestfriend/like-isms, just simply wasn't good for either of us to be prolonged.
But this isn't to say that I too, didn't enjoy "our time together". It was an eye-opening experience, and like other things, I'm glad you were my first (real relationship). I definitely learned from it in many ways, and it gave me closure, as weird as that may seem, calling going out closure. But being with you definitely taught me many things about our friendship/relationship, and it was a definite shock to see that perhaps, what we had just couldn't play out the way everyone else expected it to.
Sorry that the beginning of this card's a bit of a downer, but Jon, you should know how important you are to me. I'm relieved that things ended the way they did, and I know that I can still come to you about anything. Granted in your usual manner, you probably won't care, but at least I know you'll be able to sift through and actually listen to the important issues in my life. Even though we've lost part of our friendship (and it should be pretty evident which parts), it's nice to know, that we're still mostly us, after it all. It's very comfortable to be with you. I guess the true test will be when we both go home and interact with our at home friends, but I have a niggling feeling that we'll be fine.
So after this bittersweet card (which ironically is the song that just always reminds me of you), I hope that you finish it with the point I'm trying to make: though we don't talk very often, I will always be there for you, and though I'm a small shoulder to lean on, I can carry your weight quite well.
Love,
Tiff
